Vacation Bible School

My kids*:

• Hannah is my look-alike
• Mike is going to be a multi-millionaire when he grows up (smart little devil)
• Drake and Tanner (aka the twins) were disappointed I didn't turn into a boy today like I said I would
• Caroline, Hope, and Catherine are impossible to tell apart (but not related)
• Britain has a European name
• Alex has a name (his real one) that I thought would be a girl name........and I was expecting a girl....so when he came.....that was weird
• Kristin is the sweetest
• Travis has 13 letters in his last name and is a beast (not in the unhealthy, morbidly obese way)

We get to play games, eat snacks, sing and dance, make crafts, and play make-believe. What more could you want?

*names may have been changed

A power walk down memory lane

I never know how to start a reflection without sounding sappy or corny:

• "I thought it was going to be horrible, but (insert activity/topic) turned out to be one of the best experiences of my life"
• "I learned so many new things; not only about (insert activity/topic), but also about myself"
• "I can't believe the time has flown by so fast. It seems only yesterday when I started (insert activity/topic)"

You get the picture, and I know you've heard all of those lines before. So I'll do my best not to say too many phrases like that during this post.

But let's look back, shall we?

My first blog post. Frankly, it screams "inside joke". I hate inside jokes. They were funny in middle school. Now I hate them; nobody wants to be the one left on the outside of the joke. Saying inside joke is just a way to make yourself feel important. But it just makes you seem pompous (I suppose there are exceptions because there always are; just in general, though). So I don't care for this post very much, but it's in my history, so I don't want to delete it. It will remind me to avoid such things in the future.

Well, that got way off topic. Sorry, readers!

My first real blog post. I ended this one with "Did I do it right? I'm not sure." That pretty much sums up my feelings for a blog. I had never seen one- and had heard about them only in the context of people sitting with their laptops in coffee shops. So I felt a little bit like a baby bird tossed out of its nest to learn how to fly. This blog was wishful thinking- I used an article and commented on my thoughts. It's not a terrible post, just the expectations it set were too serious for what I wanted to do.

My first (and best) rant. Yes, I was (and still am) against ranting to the world constantly. But I have grown to accept that perhaps it is entertaining for readers to read complaints that are interesting (and not completely self-centered). And it's not boring to write, either. This post also had my first video (a now common theme among my posts).

Blog with the most comments. I got three comments on this post- a record for me.

Blogs total: Counting this post, I will have 84 blog posts. I can't believe that! It really doesn't seem like I've done that much, but it seems I have.

Overall, blogging had its moments. Some months I blogged like crazy (in April '09 I had 20 posts alone). Other times there were spells of writer's block (like this post and this one and this one). But I think it has been a good experience so far. It forces me to write a little better than normal, knowing that other people have the opportunity to read it. Will I keep blogging after this year? Not as religiously, but yes. I like the idea of having a website of my own (even if its not visited that much). And I feel technologically savvy (something I'm not used to, because I'm just horrible with computers).

But enough about me and this blog. It's a great day out; you should go and have a picnic or something.

Seniors

It feels weird knowing they will be graduating and leaving so soon. And yet, I feel odd about how I am going to miss them. I don't really have that many friends in the grade above me. Acquaintances, yes. People I talk to daily, yes. But no one I really spend time outside of school with. And yet, as I continue to get graduation party invitations, I find myself becoming sad as I think about their departure.

The same type of thing happened last year, too, I suppose. When my sister graduated, I felt that my life at home and in school would never be the same. She, her friends, and classmates all left our high school, and I thought that part of me would leave with them. But looking back, it didn't shake my world like I was expecting (you see all of those movies about how people are never the same once people leave). I didn't have many times where I thought, "My life would be so much better if they were all back here like it was my sophomore year." People around me had changed, but my life pretty much stayed the same.

Understanding that this year I have no family member leaving me, I can only assume that my feelings will be the same: painful at first, but then adaptation to my new role later. Don't get me wrong: I will miss many seniors. But they will move on and I will too.

Although comforting, this bothers me in some ways. Why don't I miss people more? I always assume our separation will be heartbreaking. It is painful at first, but after a few weeks I am back to normal. Is that how it is with everybody? Or is it just me that reacts like this? Does it mean I don't connect to people as much as I should, or does it mean I'm in healthy friendships and relationships because I am able to let go? I don't know.

Feeling no sadness makes me feel scared. If I got over a family member leaving, am I incapable of having strong feelings for anyone? It seems to me that the positive emotions I feel for people are inflated in my mind- I make myself feel that there is a stronger connection than there is (the same cannot be said for dislike- if I hate someone, those feelings take a long time to disappear, if ever). I only realize that perhaps I had exaggerated our relationship once they are gone and I feel fine. Or is it true that I feel strongly for them and I'm just 'cutting the cord' to make it easier on myself? I'm not sure. This is just a ramble of thoughts with questions that will most likely never be answered.

I (and you) need to stop thinking all of these sad thoughts. They never got anyone anywhere but down in the dumps. Besides, I believe that things will work out if you put in the effort and have a little faith.

To all of the seniors, congratulations on making it through high school! I hope you all able to do what you love, and I hope nothing ever holds you back but yourself.

Oh no.

I have to start working on Tuesday.

I had gotten lucky at the start of the spring term- I had so much tennis that it was impossible for me to come in and work. I asked my coordinator if I could delay my start date until after the regular season. She was really flexible and agreed.

Unfortunately, the regular season has ended, and I received an email from her telling me that a new project would be starting soon. If I would be able to come in and work on it, it would be recommended. Well, I didn't want to push her- she had been nice enough. So I responded with the enthusiastic, "I would love to!"

But I didn't give her the impression that I was a genius (she already knew that from the c++ classes). I even let her know I was nervous about my abilities. She reassured me, letting me know that I would be on a project with someone she referred to as "brilliant." She explained he would be located in the cubicle next to me, ready to assist me if, more like when, I have no idea what I'm doing. Perhaps his genius will even rub off on me. Or maybe he'll go and complain to my manager about how "that stupid annoying girl" won't leave him alone.

Please cross your fingers for me. That would be much appreciated!

Slumdog Millionaire

Yes, yes, I know- this movie came out months ago. I had heard great things about it and have been wanting to watch it for a long time, but I kept putting it off until my sister came home (I had promised her we would watch it together, and by the time she arrived my homework load would be less obnoxious). I went into the film with high expectations- something I hate to do but can't help. You know when you go into something expecting greatness, and you always come out disappointed because it couldn't live up to your inflated expectations? I worried that this would happen with Slumdog Millionaire, because I have been in desperate need of a movie to lift my spirits.

You know what? I came out loving it. My expectations were fulfilled. The movie, a story of a poor, uneducated contestant on the Indian version of Who Wants to Be a Millionaire, is as incredible a film as I have ever seen. Throughout the movie, he is accused of cheating for continually knowing the answers to increasingly difficult questions on the show. Yet you discover that it was his life (destiny, as the movie puts it) that had given him all of the answers. He has lived them.

You learn of his heartbreaking childhood, a lost love, and a struggle between brothers. You find yourself urging on the poverty-stricken children, praying for their safety, and begging characters to do....well, whatever they are supposed to do to make the story come out right ("No, don't leave!" "Turn around! Turn around!" "Run! Run! No, that way! Other way!"; you get the picture). The story greets you, envelopes you, and before you know it, it has captured your heart. For anyone who disagrees with that statement, I would be interested to hear why you were not entranced.

The film is based on Vikas Swarup's novel Q&A, if any of you are interested in checking that out. I think I'll have to put it on my summer reading list.

If I haven't done so already, I do apologize that this review is done in such delay to the movie. I suppose this is sort of like a 'last call' to all of you out there who have not seen it yet. If you think this is just another movie that can be set aside, please reconsider. Seeing this film may not change the course of your life, but it can touch your heart, giving you faith that even in the worst of situations, people can persevere.

Go rent it.

"Angels on the Moon" by Thriving Ivory

Why are you online right now?

It's Mother's Day, for goodness' sake! Get your little rear out of that computer chair and go hug your mom. You're probably asking me why I'm doing this blog, then. My mother is actually not in town right now, but will be home later tonight when I will spend time with her then.

Not much for hugs? Go and buy her a gift (like flowers, a cute purse, or even an ice cream cone- I'm not talking big bucks here; just something so that she knows you were thinking about her). And you don't even have to buy anything- just make her a short card. I know, I know, I'm not one for the lovey-dovey-let's-talk-about-our-feelings cards. I'm not that type of person. I'm not one to write, "You've always been there for me and I love you always." It would just be a weird moment (would she expect that type of writing now every time I make a card? Would I be expected to share my emotions? Gross). So just write honestly (and kindly, mind you). If the card thing freaks you out, just spend time with her.

Your mom's not in town? Call her. Seriously, it's one measly day of the year- I think you can manage to set aside a few moments.

Why are you still reading? Go!