My Fish Named Roxanne

Roxanne is my betta fish I received for my birthday. Unfortunately, the name was chosen without reading the owner's guide and before I had a chance to talk to my sister.

"What did you name him?"

"Him?"

It turns out that stores only sells male bettas- the females don't have the flowing fins and bright colors. My Roxanne was a Roxandrew. But the name was already given and I was not about to take it back. Whether he liked it or not, he would be named after girl.


I am surprised that I am able to write about him at the moment. Normally a fish would be dead by now if entrusted to my care. I am proud to say that we are coming up on almost four months of coexistence, and he doesn't look like he's going to go belly-up anytime soon (though how would I know? I don't know what a sick fish looks like).


Throughout our short time together, Roxanne has taught me a few things:

1. Not all fish follow your finger around. In fact, it's the opposite way around. Whenever I put my index finger up to the vase (Roxanne doesn't need a tank- he's all alone and we don't want him getting spoiled by such a large living space), he backs away. It's very gradual- he probably hopes I don't notice. But I do, so I do the considerate thing and continue following him. After a while, he gets angry and puffs out his gills (as in photo-scary, I know). You'd think I'd learn, but I still try it once in a while. I know I'm not amusing him, but I can't give up the hope that maybe someday he will become curious.
2. If you can't see them they can't see you. There is a fat purple ribbon around the narrow neck of the vase. When Roxanne is tired/annoyed (of/with me, my family, etc.), he goes and hides behind the ribbon. Not much else to say about that- avoidance is the best way to solve a problem (though, I guess, what else would he do? nibble our fingers to death?).
3. Stop freaking out- things aren't as fragile as they seem. A good philosophy to apply to life. After being out of town for three days, I was sure that I would have to flush my fish down the toilet. To my suprise, I found him, while slightly POed, in as good of condition as ever. My conclusion? Roxanne is a tough cookie- we don't give him, or other things, enough credit for their own abilities. Parents treat their first child like a china doll. By the second or third, they realize that the emergency room isn't needed every time the baby falls down. While I'm not advocating for you to leave an infant alone for days, you don't have to constantly worry.

I'm sure there are many other secrets my she-named betta has yet to teach me. But for now, I'll try to maintain the will-power not to chase Roxanne around with my finger.

PS: Any real betta fish problems? This person seems like one who could answer your non-philosophical questions.