Please Pass the Salt and the Socially-Acceptable Behavior.

My family is going over to our neighbors' house for dinner tonight. We haven't been over to someone's like this in about a year (we're not antisocial or anything...i don't think...it's just that the opportunity never comes up). I hope my proper social behavior hasn't gone rusty. Potential problems I see:

• Soo......: I won't be able to think of anything to talk about. "How's life next door? See any creepers around?" probably isn't the best conversation-starter. As I sit here and brainstorm, though, there is actually a lot we can catch up on: The wife (what should I call her? The woman? The girl? The female next-door-neighbor?) is pregnant, and I'm not sure how far along she is. Have they thought of names? Do they know if it's a boy or a girl? I can take that card and run with it. At least until my parents jump in.
• Meat? MEAT?!?: This poses more of a dilemma than an opportunity for a neighbor throw-down. I am Catholic. It is the Lenten season. Today is Friday. Friday = no meat during Lent. What are they serving? Meatballs. We're not those people that force our religion on other people-"I reject this sinful food you have prepared. Go back and make something else." We'll eat it and have a nice time (wouldn't it be worse to push the plate away? I think so). I just like picturing what that scene would be like.
• Life story- unabridged or edited?: I know that neighbors are always curious about each other. But how much do they really want to know? How much should be told? I don't want to end up telling them every allergen that makes me break out into a rash, but I don't come off as revealing as a Top-Secret FBI agent. Where is the balance?

I'll just have to see how it goes. Hopefully I won't insult them enough to make them kick us out of their home and move away. That would go under a "that didn't go so well" category. Yet I remain optimistic: I have resolved that I will act socially acceptable and will have a good time, and what more can I really hope for?

It couldn't go this bad.